It’s rainy, and I am confused. I am being toyed with, my feelings are being toyed with, you are in control. I guess I’ve never been in control over you. You hold the key, you care less. it hurts. everything hurts. my cuts hurt. and yet I make more. my head hurts, I continue to run. my heart hurts and it continues to beat. until the day it doesn’t. I need you to breathe.
you say you love me, you say you can’t see me with another man.
I understand what you mean and I understand how you feel and that it’s mainly my fault. but I still believe we can make it work, as long as you can from the bottom of your heart say that you love me and mean it. That’s all we need, my love is still active and hot.
I remember when I was gonna do it and you begged and cried and i couldn’t. I love you. I can’t break it off. You broke it off and I don’t understand. You still love me and I still love you. Let us be together. because if we’re together I have a sense of direction, like this im lost. even if we’re apart I have a sense of direction. but I can’t live like this for too long. You know I’m not as strong as I’d like to be.
I don’t understand why. I know we have trouble. but I thought we were going to have everything.
I guess not.
It hurts. I want to have everything.
I’m just a literally bloody mess without you.